According to the fine folks over at The Superficial, Mena Suvari (American Beauty) was caught enjoying a vacation in Miami with her boyfriend Simone Sestito (Eh?). I’m puzzled as just to where in the hell Mena got that ass from. I thought she was a midget. Does she live under power lines or something? Or, no, I got it: She was bitten by a radioactive Kim Kardashian. Yes, of course, that seems more likely. *strokes beard* I should be a doctor. Wait, I don’t have a beard oh God Cindy I’m sorry. Uh, how’s my favorite HR gal doing today? Still competing in the lumberjack games I’m getting sued aren’t I? Fantastic.
See more photos at The Superficial
Photos: Bauer-Griffin
