Nov 7

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Angelina Jolie’s character in Beowulf apparently shows a little more skin than the actress expected. She didn’t expect to “come out as much” and was a “little shy” after seeing the final product, according to Fox News:

“I didn’t expect it to feel as real and so, especially because of the type of character I play, it was funny at first and then there were certain moments where I felt actually shy and called home and just explained the kind of fun movie I had done that was digital animation was, in fact, a little different than I think they were expecting.

While millions of fanboys are drooling over the chance to see a nude CGI Angelina Jolie, who got totally duped by Robert Zemeckis (nice one!), they are not alone. John Malkovich is stoked as well:

“It’s PG-13, so at least I’m told there are things and adult themes on the Internet that may push the envelope quite a bit further than a PG-13, but we’ll see; I haven’t seen it yet,” he told FOX at Monday’s star-studded premiere. “Of course, I’m excited to see Angelina on-screen … she’s …she’s talented.”

Way to not give off a creepy vibe, John Malkovich. There’s nothing your female costars love more than when you talk in freaking ellipsis while suggesting you want to see their… their… “talents.” No, no, that’s not creepy. Women love it. Oh, hey, you getting naked in this movie? Can’t wait to see it. With my eyes. Then remember it - forever. Yeah, chicks dig that. No, really. When they pepper spray you in the mouth, that’s their way of saying “Thanks.” Ha ha, dames. Such kidders.

Original post by Eddie

Nov 6

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Angelina Jolie’s brother James Haven attended the premiere of Beowulf last night in Los Angeles. Honest to God, they should’ve gotten this guy to play the Joker because he has the freakiest goddamn face I have ever seen. Can you imagine what it’s like for Brad Pitt when this dude comes over for dinner?

[Scene: The Pitt-Jolie dining room table. Angelina is tending to the children, while Brad and James sit and eat.]

James: Brad, I bet your soul tastes delicious.

Brad: Huh? What did you just say?

James: Oh, nothing. Just the peas are delicious. Like your soul.

Brad: Did you just, no, did you just say my soul is delicious?

James: Angie, dear, this dinner is simply wonderful. Almost as good as that time we made love in a canoe.

Brad: Gets up. You motherfu–

James: Jumps to his feet. Oh, Lord, yes! Pretend I’m Edward Norton in Fight Club and I just bought a tea cozy from Ikea! Oooh, I’m a naughty, naughty consumer of goods. Punish me before I get a Discover card!

Brad: Shakes his head. Why do I agree to these dinners? The sex isn’t that good.

James: Maybe it’d be if you were related! Zing! God, aren’t I to die for? No, but, seriously, Brad let’s be friends. Now, take off your pants and give me a hug.

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Photos: Getty Images, Bauer-Griffin.com

Original post by Eddie

Nov 6

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Jessica Simpson attended the 11th Annual Ace Awards last night in New York City and nearly took a spill when her heel became stuck. Fortunately she gained her balance and made some hilarious faces in the process. Knowing from numerous experiences how to recover from an embarrassing situation, Jessica Simpson went inside and demonstrated how awesome her rack is by turning sideways for photographers. Nice save. Seriously, I already forgot what I was just talking about. Also it appears I forgot to wear pants this morning. That’s odd. Could’ve sworn I had them on in the car…

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Original post by Eddie

Nov 5

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Kelly Brook launched “Kelly Brook Lingerie for New Look” in London today. Jessica Simpson could learn a thing or two here. She had the first step right, she showed off the big guns. I’ll give her that. But her British counterpart Kelly Brook went the extra mile and brought in some lingerie models. That’s how you launch something. I hope you’re taking notes, Jessica. No, you’re not. You’re eating the pen. That’s a start, I suppose. Just don’t swallow the ink agai– ah, shit. Hello, poison control? Yeah, the Simpson place. Ha ha, you know us. Anyway, just come right in. I believe we gave you guys a key when you were here this morning. No, no. The second time. Right, the swallowed battery.

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Photos: Splash News

Original post by Eddie

Nov 5

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Jessica Simpson posed for the cameras as she introduced her new clothing line at Macy’s Herald Square in New York City. So does the entire line consist of a pink set of heels and a black leather purse? Because, honestly, I’m impressed. When I heard Jessica Simpson had a clothing line I expected it to be at best a pair of Play-Doh earrings. And, maybe, a beach towel covered in spaghetti sauce. You know, if she really put her mind to it and dared to dream and stuff.

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Photos: Getty Images, Splash News

Original post by Eddie

Nov 5

thumb.eva-6.jpgEva Longoria was spotted in the Alamo city.
Wondering what she was doing there? She went there to cheer up her hubby for his match.
Tony Parker had his game with the San Antonio Spurs in Alamo city. She was present in the match to support her man.

Eva was looking cool and comfortable in grey top an…

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Original post by Eddie

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